Can't Be Taken

Just Because a Man Identifies as a Liberal Feminist, That Doesn’t Mean He Can’t Be Abusive

by Vanessa Blakeslee

I spent the first week of October with my father, side-by-side in the Florida condo where I’ve long resided. Pieces to a board game lay scattered throughout the house, the wooden board missing, likely destroyed. A three-quart, stainless-steel Calphalon pot surfaced, eerily bent into an oval. Shards of broken glass and plaster littered a decorative tray. Together, we tallied the damage: photos torn, tools vanished, laundry basket and other household items gone. We repaired a hasty spackle job covering up a blow to the wall where the glass, or a fist, had landed. I spent hours crouched with a dustbin, picking up bits of fine glass from across the living room floor. The same man who had wreaked havoc on my home had also left open the passenger window of my car, apparently during heavy rains. Several inches of putrid, standing water awaited me when I climbed in. Read more at Bustle . . . 

Also by Vanessa Blakeslee, “Pura Vida: Reflections on the Good Life,” Freshly Pressed!

2 replies »

  1. Predators. How does a predator get to the prey? Assuming the persona of a “good guy” helper, a liberal and a feminist. There are many men that were holding #notallmen signs that should have read #YesIamAnAbuser, of that I am sure. I wish you artistic success and continued healing.

  2. Your well-written and thoughtful story transforms some of your anguish into a small but meaningful victory in the struggle to expose the true face of violence and abuse. Thank you for your courage; you’re a brave woman and a terrific writer. Here’s to you and to your ongoing growth and success in every way!

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