What HuffPo didn’t want you to read: “A Tape Doesn’t Change a Goddamn Thing” by Karrie Higgins

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Last week, Karrie Higgins (whose work we’ve highlighted before) published an essay so controversial, the Huffington Post took it down and deleted her contributor account within hours of it going live. Higgins’ essay, originally titled “Donald Trump confessed to sexual assault on tape and so did my brother, and here is what I know: a tape doesn’t change a goddamned thing,” is a devastating and necessary account of the reality so many women face regarding sexual assault, why it is under reported, and why so may male assailants roam free.

Why Won’t She Leave Him?

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Don’t tell her what to do; talk to her and listen. Offer your help, but understand that to leave or not to leave is her decision. Respect it. And tell her you respect her.

Acknowledge the pain and turmoil she is in, most especially the emotional turmoil. If she doesn’t leave him, don’t give up on her leaving him. Give her love, respect, support, and time. It’s going to take all of that.

Growing up With a Mentally Ill Mother and the Stigma It Should Not Entail

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As I listen to the commentary and interviews in broadcast media and read op-ed pieces about the recent stabbings and shootings, I struggle to accept the truth: there but for some sort of grace goes my family. We could have been chasing after my mother on a paranoid spree of violence. We could any day be the victims of someone else’s unstable loved one. So could you. How do we face such a threat? How do we diffuse the ill, who are so often victims themselves.